Speak Compassion

It appears my comments are still down.  I can post a comment, but it seems no one else can.   I have no explaination and my host was not helpful in finding the problem.  I have uninstalled WordPress and reinstalled it.   Sadly, in that process I lost my style sheet so the blog is looking a bit different.   I will try and fix this, but on the other hand.  I may not fix any of this.  Who knows for sure?

Anyone have a clue what is the cause of these errors?

I have wondered and pondered just what I would write about the death of Rev. Jerry Falwell. His death has brought such varied responses from the left and the right of politics, but I feel one’s death should never be made into a political gain or loss. I have looked at most of the rhetoric around Rev. Falwell and see such passion, anger followed by such love and hate. Amazing how one man’s life could bring about such a varied response of emotion.

I can see pretty clearly this was more about his life than his death. It was about the morals he stood for, the fights and battles he chose and the methods that made those things come into light. From his life I see one important fact. Change happens even to the best of us. Even our most held beliefs are subject to change with enlightenment and this good man was the testament to that change.

At one point in the good man’s life he was in favor of segregation, even in his own church. That changed for Rev. Falwell. In time, he open his church doors to people of all races and colors. He left behind any intolerance, bigotry or prejudice in favor of diversity. This was a display of the change we all can undertake. This was justice in motion and changing lives. This was also inspiration for so many others to do as he did.

At one point the Rev. Falwell was against interracial marriage. He spoke against it. he rallied the troops of the moral majority to fight it. In the end, this too change for the good Rev. Falwell. These small changes made big impressions on our culture that bigotry and prejudice do die with time and understanding.

Falwell made the mistake of blaming gays and lesbians, as well as abortionists for the September 11th attacks on America. This was another unfortunate display of misinformation and hate from a man who otherwise tried so hard to live his life in the Christian light. One cannot help but wonder if Falwell’s view on gays would not have softened with time much like his views on Race. Either way, his life has been a testament that prejudice does die. It changes into good with knowledge and understanding.

I wish his family the best in these trouble times, but I wish more for all of America to look at Falwell’s life and the testament of change. He was a model for bigotry’s death as each year of his life proved that change happens and it can move us all towards a beloved community.

I am not angry nor bitter at the life of this man. Instead, I choose to look at the change and see it as hope for the future that even the most bigoted of us can change. The most racist of us can become champions of civil rights. It takes time, understanding and a level of patience that few of us have but all of us need. Rev. Falwell’s life is a testament to change, I pray we choose that for his legacy, forgive his mistakes and do the same for those living with us today in the same condition.

Forgiveness is the most precious commodity we have. It will take us farther than money, farther than hope and grant us more of the community we all pray for in the world.

From 365gay.com 

(Greenville, County, South Carolina) An 18 year old man is facing a murder charge after a man he punched died.

The Greenville County Sheriff’s Office said that Sean William Kennedy, 20, was walking to his car from a local bar when a car stopped along side him. A man got out, approached Kennedy and then hit him in the face.

Witnesses said the man made a derogatory remark about Kennedy’s sexuality.  The twenty-year old was openly gay friends said.

Kennedy later died in hospital without regaining consciousness. Investigators believe that after he was punched Kennedy fell to the ground and hit his head on a curb or the pavement.

Based on witness accounts of the attacker and car Sheriff’s deputies arrested Andrew Moller, 18.

Moller is being held without bond.

Investigators say they have not determined if the two men knew each other, or what led to the attack

The daughter of the late Martin Luther King, Jr. has died at the age of 51.  Yolonda Denise King was an actress, writer and nonviolence activist.   She even played Rosa Parks in the movie “King”.   Her death comes just a year and a half after the death of her mother, Corretta Scott King.   She stood with the members of Soulforce in the fight to use nonviolence for civil rights for gays and lesbians.   She will be greatly missed.

A Rhode Island Couple have been the subject of harassment by their neighbor in Kent County.   The Rhode Island Office of Civil Rights has filed violations against the neighbor, Paul O’Rouke.  O’Rouke was heard yelling anti-gay slurs while being taken away in the police cruiser, including yelling “Homicide, I”ll give you homicide, I’ll kill those faggots”.

You can read the whole story here

My take on this is that having this man arrested isn’t going to solve the problem.  Fining him will only make him more bitter and hate gay people even more.   Nonviolence is the answer.   Mediation is the answer.   All parties in this situation are victims, including the man arrested.  It was neccessary to arrest him, I can see that, but I can also see he will seek revenge.   Restraining orders will only make him resentful and more angry.   Hopefully, the judge in this case will see the potential this situation has to get more violent than it has already been.

According to a study released today by the University of Michigan, questions about homosexuality are not addressed to adolescent boys either by parents, friends, or even the media.   The study looked at where young men are getting the most influential information regarding sexual Education.   Young men, aged 18-24 were asked to reflect and report on what forms of communication most influenced them and their knowledge about sexual issues.

From the Press Release (emphasis mine):

A total of 286 male undergraduates aged 18-24 were asked to recall who had had the greatest influence on their sexual education and, more specifically, who had discussed or been responsible for which aspects. The authors’ goal was to determine whether there is a difference in the information gleaned from parents, peers, and the media, and if the information provided by each group differed in the types of sexual values expressed.

In line with prior studies, the researchers found that most parents had provided some education, but that the type of information provided contrasted sharply to that given by peers and the media. Parents were the strongest supporters of abstinence and provided most information about pregnancy and fertilization. However, for all other topics, parents were seen as having contributed the least.

Communication from peers, conversely, encouraged nonrelational sex and provided models of dating and sexual behavior and information on being ‘cool’. The media appeared to be equally influential and was strongest in promoting gendered sexual stereotypes and in giving messages promoting sexual freedom. However, the authors point out that there was a great variation between the subjects in what had been covered by which source. For example, the media was also seen as providing the most information on AIDS, STDs, and condoms. Issues of love and homosexuality did not appear to be addressed by any of the sources.

This pretty much shoots the idea that today’s youth are being “brainwashed” about sexual issues, even when homosexuality is being discussed.   If anything this shows that today’s young men are not learning about the issues, concerns, questions or realities about homosexuality from their peers, parents or the media.   This proves what most of the research has shown before.  Gay young men grow up feeling isolated and alone.

For years I have stated that the science and propaganda of the religious right is a scary resemblance to the hate propaganda of the Nazi’s in Germany.  Now, those fears are being crystallized as writers like Jim Burroway at Box Turtle Bulletin has really exposed the key researcher of the religious right as having an agenda to “exterminate” gays and lesbians. 

Jim writes as a recap of his article about the things the man the religious right is using as the source of their anti-gay research:

• Homosexuality is a learned habit or behavior, chosen simply because it’s “fun” and for no other reason. Much as some people have fun doing drugs, gay men and women are simply having “fun” when they have sex with others of their own gender. This it the full limit to what homosexuality is all about.
• Homosexuals however, aren’t satisfied with just having “fun” with each other. Instead, gays and lesbians are constantly recruiting others to join the fold — just as they were recruited through what he calls “direct” and “indirect” means.
• Homosexuals operate a “quasi-secret society” which enables them to maintain an extensive network of contacts for career advancement in the military and the furtherance of their “dangerous adventures.”
• Homosexuals place themselves above all others, demanding “Super Rights” to the detriment of others.
• While homosexuals demand these “Super Rights” from society, they are actually a burden and a danger to that society. Because of their burden and their failure to reproduce, they live “parasitic lives.”
• The best way to deal with homosexuals is to recriminalize sodomy, making it a felony punishable by up to five years in prison.
• The suggestion that those who are HIV-positive should be quarantined for the rest of their lives is a perfectly “reasonable” way of dealing with the epidemic, as evidenced by the “success” demonstrated by repressive totalitarian regimes like Cuba.
• The fate of Western Civilization hangs on how we respond to the threat.

This is a man the such groups as Americans for Truth, The American Family Association, Concerned Women for America, the Family Research Council and others have used as the staple to pin gays and lesbians are unhealthy, violent, and diseased.   If you read anything about the religious right this week make sure you read Jim’s article.

Warren Throckmorton has also helped this effort by listing the groups that use Cameron’s work.   Be sure to check that out too!  Notice our friends Matt Barber, Peter LaBabera and NARTH are all on the list.

Let us never forget that Paul Cameron is the same man who said:

At the 1985 Conservative Political Action Conference, Cameron announced to the attendees, “Unless we get medically lucky, in three or four years, one of the options discussed will be the extermination of homosexuals.” According to an interview with former Surgeon General C. Everett Koop, Cameron was recommending the extermination option as early as 1983.

Here on this site, and in the upcoming book, “Holy Bullies and Headless Monsters“, and at Box Turtle Bulletin, we have seen time and time again how the so called medical dangers of homosexuality by John Diggs, MD has been refuted.   The whole idea that being gay is some sort of deathstyle is just and old tired claim of those who wish to paint gays and lesbians with a negative and broad brush. They say we all live the same exact lifestyle and write us off as the evil in the world.  A claim that invites violence against GLBT folks.

No one does this better than the misguided and misinformed, Peter La Barbera of the group Americans for Truth (AFT).  (Of course, from this writer’s point of view, I think Peter’s group is as far from truth as you can get).    His entire site is just one huge negative picture of GLBT folks.   We all know that a rational person who is only shown one side of a group of people and that side is painted as a threat to children, marriage and society, is going to have hostile emotions towards said group.   We also know that words have power and that this type of propaganda is passive violence.   It is also a form of structural violence that leads to hate crimes, discrimination and bullying for GLBT folks, but Peter can’t seem to see that from where he is standing.   He sadly rejects any attempt to show him the view from the other side.  This post is my latest attempt at stopping this violence.

Today, AFT has two articles posted on their website that push the idea of homosexuality being “dangerous” and unhealthy, including links to the overused and highly refuted work of Dr. John Diggs.   While both of these articles of filled with venomous remarks about gays and lesbians, they are also filled with inaccuracies about GLBT folks.  I will address the specifics of these articles posted today because they display so well the myths, hate and misinformation that so easily come out of these organizations like Americans for Truth.

The first article addresses a school in Chicago where a substitute teacher showed the film, “Brokeback Mountan” to a group of 8th graders.  Mr. La Barbera states in his article:

Alas, more corruption of youth at the hands of pro-homosexual activists. The movement that once asked just to be left alone is now pushing homosexuality on middle school students.

I am not sure what Peter was thinking but I see one substitute teacher who showed this movie.  She doesn’t appear to be a homosexual activist and she may not be homosexual herself.  So what movement is Mr. LaBarbera talking about?   Is every person that supports equality part of the same movement?   What is Peter’s fascination with lumping all gays and lesbians into one group? 

I have no idea why she would choose to show a group of 8th graders, “BrokeBack Mountain” since it is filled with bad language, sex and violence.   I don’t condone showing kids “R” rated movies when they are not accompanied by an adult.  I also don’t condone showing movies filled with violence to adults let alone children.  On the other hand, I have taught 8th graders and know fully well  that many of them have seen things in real life far worse than anything in that movie.

Where this article takes a turn for the worse on Peter’s part is his language.  He uses words like venom on a knifed tongue.  A sample excerpt:

I saw Brokeback Mountain in the theater because I had to. It is a highly effective propaganda film well-suited to exploit today’s widespread confusion over “sexual orientation” and “same-sex love.” The film is about two male cowboys who “fall in love,” and features a sudden sodomitic encounter in a tent that is, well, let’s just say, biological and medical fantasy. The film, of course, seeks to advance the fiction that “gay” romantic love is just like the normal variety except with different genders. But that ignores, for one thing, the terrible damage that sodomy (i.e., anal sex) exacts on the body. That’s why many male initiates into homosexual sex get high on drugs or alcohol first — to dull the pain (and the shame) of this unnatural and sinful behavior.

A few points about this paragraph: 

• The above paragraph starts out with the idea that any film made about the lives of gays and lesbians is propaganda.   A fact that is not the truth that Peter claims he is standing for in the first place.   Should we assume that every movie about Christians is Christian propaganda?   This assertion on Peter’s part is not only dishonest, it is narrow thinking.   This again proves that Peter’s end result is that we disappear.  Any books, movies about our lives are reduced to mere “agenda” items rather than stories about out lives.  I have asked Peter a number of times with still no reply: “What is the end game look like for GLBT folks when you reach the goal you are working towards, are we in the concentration camps?  In jail?  or just dead?  No answer from Mr. LaBarbera.
• He continues this paragraph with the bizarre statement that a “Sodomite encounter” is a biological and medical fantasy.   I re-read that statement a few times and still couldn’t tell you what it means.   
• The next sentence is what I would call a freudian slip on Peter’s part.  He says the film seeks to advance gay love but fails to address the medical dangers of gay sex.   He makes one of his many links to the John Diggs article on the medical dangers of gay sex.   We have refuted that article over and over and over again and Mr. LaBarbera knows it is a flawed piece of hate propaganda. 
• He ends this lovely tirade with the unfounded claim that gays have to get stoned to dull pain and shame before they have sex.   Where did he learn this? This notion is false and a bit absurd.  What he is referring to is anal sex.   A practice not reserved for homosexuals, but heterosexuals engage in this practice as well.  Some research indicates that 10% of America’s Heterosexual population engage in this sexual practice.   If it is so painful, why are so many people doing it?

This is the analysis of only one paragraph of Peter’s writing skills.  While he is a terribly effective writer, his words are filled with misinformation, lies and hate.   While I know he jumps up and down screaming that he is not engaging in hate speech, that doesn’t change the fact, he is.

The next paragraph:

Predictably, in Brokeback, one of the male lovers is savagely murdered by homosexual-hating hetero cowboys - another lesson I’m sure the militant Chicago teacher wanted to impress on her captive audience: if you disagree with the homosexual lifestyle, you are a “hater” and mean-spirited “homophobe.” Never mind that the vast majority of people who oppose homosexual behavior do not hate people but merely agree with God about harmful and changeable behaviors that do not define a person; and decent people are rightfully outraged at the idea of promoting this dangerous homosexual lifestyle to impressionable children.

Here are the talking points of why this is just hate speech:

• The first long winded sentence is strange for me.   He talks about how is it predictable that one of the men in the movie is murdered for being gay. Why is that predictable?  Now how that connects to the second half of the statement is past me, but he is stating that everyone who disagrees the “homosexual Lifestyle” is a hater.  When no, Peter, that is you playing victim.   To start with, not every gay person on the earth has the same lifestyle.  Why he continues to use such a hateful and inaccurate phrase in also past me.   If he isn’t writing hate speech, then he wouldn’t use this phrase.   I have no idea what the “gay lifestyle” looks like for Peter, but my gay life looks nothing like the stuff Peter finds to write about gay people.   I can also assure Peter that two of my closet friends are ex-nuns.    They came to my commitment ceremony to support us even though they felt they needed us to know they felt, based on the bible, that our relationship is a sin.   They have been wonderful friends despite their opposition to our relationship and their belief we are sinners.  They are living proof you can oppose gays on religious grounds without being hateful.   Peter should meet them and learn something from them.  They think we are “decent” people.
• The next sentence is more hate speech and I will tell you why:  First he again refers to gays as having a “lifestyle”, second, he refers to “decent” people being opposed to gays.   That just clearly says that Peter thinks that gays and lesbians, and anyone who supports us must NOT be decent people.   Well, guess what Mr. LaBarbera.  You are wrong.   Gays and Lesbians are very decent people, despite being forced to live in a world where they are demonized.  Our supporters are also decent people.   For Mr. LaBarbera to imply otherwise is just wrong.   Just the fact Mr. LaBarbera refers to GLBT folks as not being decent people shows you what he really thinks of us and trust me calling even your worst enemy “not a decent” person is wrong.
• Lastly, he again calls the gay “lifestyle” dangerous and tries to make us look like we are after the “impressionable” young children.  That’s right folks, Peter is making it clear to you that we are a threat to children.  That is hate speech.  That is exactly what the Nazi’s did to the Jews.  That is exactly what segregationist did to blacks telling whites to watch their daughters.   This is classic hate speech on historic levels.   LaBarbera is working his way to being the next Gobbels or the next Bull Connor.  I can tell you even Bull Connor regrets the things he has done.

He then goes on to ask people to take action:

TAKE ACTION:  If you are an adult, dedicate yourself to educating the young people in your sphere of influence about the truth about homosexuality. Tell them about former homosexuals like Charlene Cothran and Steve Bennett. Visit NARTH’s (National Association for Research and Therapy on Homosexuality) excellent website. Show them Professor Rob Gagnon’s site, which ably refutes the nefarious “gay theology” that seeks to negate the Bible’s clear proscriptions against homosexual acts. 

Now keep in mind, I am only dissecting one article to show you and Peter, since I am sure he will read this, how and why this is hate speech and not “truth” as Peter claims.

• Peter’s call to action is nothing more than a call to arms against GLBT folks.   He wants you to believe that homosexuals can just change and be happy straight people.   I can tell you for every name Peter can list as a “changed” homosexual, I will give you 5 who went through an ex-gay ministry or Reparative Therapy and were deeply damaged by the process.   I remind folks that every mental health association, every medical association worth their credits warns of the dangers involved in these therapies.
• He is also asking people to visit the site of NARTH.  A group who promotes the work of discredited anti-gay researcher, Paul Cameron.  This is the same man who calls for the extermination of gays and lesbians.   Why would Peter link people to someone who wants us dead?  Why would Mr. LaBarbera constanly refer people to Cameron’s work when he is calling for our extermination?

Here is Peter’s last paragraph before giving you the story about the teacher from the news:

We have no choice but to be aggressive with the truth, because our foes are so aggressive in promoting their lies - even to innocent kids in the classroom. I’m afraid that in our society, even children brought up well by moral-minded parents will have drunk some of the pro-”gay” Kool-Aid by the time they reach adulthood - so saturated is our culture with politically correct, activist nonsense on this issue.

The talking points on the last paragraph:

• Peter makes another claim that gays are after the “innocent kids in the classroom”.  It is a plea to make you see gays as the predator and threat against kids.   This is classic hate propaganda in the style of some of the best propaganda writers of the Nazi era.   But you cannot expect to paint gays as a threat and then play dumb when people take violent action to defend themself against the threat.
• The kool-Aid plug is an attempt to link teaching about gays and lesbians as some sort of cult?   I am not sure, but you can see it is a statement that wishes the reader to associate pro-gay anything with poison as we all know of the story about the Jim Jones and Mass Suicide by drinking laced KoolAid.   This statement is also just another example of how Peter is not giving his readers the truth, but his misguided version of misinformation.
• I would also point out that Peter isn’t being aggressive, he is being violent.  It may not be physical violence, but it is violence just the same.

This is the amount of untruth in just one of Peter LaBarbera’s articles and he has an entire site of this.  The time to take action is about the only thing Peter and I agree on in this article.   We need to take action as every great movement of oppression has in the past.  Learn the art of nonviolence in the spirit of Gandhi, King, Chevez, Thich Nhat Hanh and fight back with love.   It has worked in the past and it will work again.

I just received an action alert from Tony Perkins, the President of the Family Research Council (which is not about family or real research, but that is beside the point…).  It is the worst piece of hypocrisy I have seen so far.  Perkins is complaining about Lou Dobbs, a CNN person.  I didn’t see the Lou Dobbs piece, so I can’t vouch for what Perkins has to say.  Apparently Dobbs wants churches who get involved in the political process to have their tax-free status taken away.  I couldn’t agree more.  However, what is so disgustingly hypocritical is that Perkins has the ultimate nerve to quote Rev. Martin Luther King in his defense of the clergy getting involved in politics.  What is so hypocritical about this?  Perkins was involved in the buying of the KKK’s mailing list.  It was Tony Perkins who signed the authorization slip.  This mailing list was obtained from none other than the Grand Wizard of the KKK–David Duke.  You can read all about it here. 

Of course Tony Perkins, the President of the Family Research Council, said he couldn’t remember the $82,000 that was spent on obtaining the KKK mailing list.  At that point Tony Perkins was the campaign manager to Woody Jenkins, who unsuccessfully ran for the U.S. Senate in 1996. 

This is what Tony Perkins, today, had to say (the bolding is his):