Speak Compassion

The same man who appears in this ad that claims “Change is Possible” is also the same man who just appeared on Montel saying “we cannot change people”.  Meet Alan Chambers.

Who is telling the lies and who is telling the truth?   Is this just a misunderstanding?   I don’t think so.

While I was entertained when Peter La Barbera called me obsessed with Americans for Truth, I find that obsession much like most people’s obsession with American Idol.   Peter on the other hand has proven he has a very unhealthy obsession with what gay men do in bed.   His latest post is clearly evidence of this obsession.

Peter somehow has lost site of the facts of human sexuality.  Simply, most people seem to void in their mind that nothing gay men do in the sack is any different from what heterosexuals do.   Anal sex, oral sex, etc…all the same as what I see on any heterosexual porn site.

Peter writes in a very amusing article on his site for Americans for Truth:

“We should demand answers from the equivocating politicians and agnostic media: is it moral for men to engage in anal sodomy with one another? Is it moral for a man to stick his sex organ in the anus or mouth of another man? What about licking another man’s anus, as an act of pleasure? (Again, “rimming” … yuck…. no wonder “gay” advocates call this the “ick factor” and avoid publicly discussing actual homosexual behaviors like the plague.)”

As I read this, Yes I was laughing a tad.    Does Peter not get it, that heterosexuals have anal sex and that women have been famous for giving oral sex to the President?   Gay Advocates don’t discuss gay sex because it isn’t necessary to discuss it.  No “ick” factor is involved in it, just no necessity for it.   My right to see my partner in the hospital ER has nothing to do with sex.

The real reason behind La Babera’s article is a discussion on morality of gay sex.    Like their shouldn’t be a discussion on the morality of half the things that heterosexuals do.  He seems to never mention that which I would call deception by omission.   It is the things Peter never says, that say everything about him.   

A recent letter to the LA Times about the recent comments by Gen. Pace by University of California Professor, Nathaniel Frank came to mind when I read La Barbera rant.   Frank writes:

“Although people often conflate religion and morality, the two are not the same. Religion is about faith; morality is about goodness. Yet both are often invoked to express strongly held beliefs. Without offering an explanation of what is actually wrong with homosexuality, Pace, like those who invoke the Bible to oppose gay rights, is merely parroting dogma he inherited, not making a reasoned argument.”

I might say the same for La Babera, whose focus as usual is to invoke fear of homosexuals.   In his latest article he tries to scare invoking gay sex and the “ick” factor he tries to convince you people have.  The truth is most people either don’t think about it when they think of gay rights.   The obvious reason is that is doesn’t and should matter what gays do in bed anymore than it should matter what heterosexuals do in bed.    Trust me I have gotten enough spam in my email for all sorts of sick stuff that heterosexuals are doing in bed.   Stuff that certainly gives me an “ick” factor.  

Peter asks gays and lesbians this crazy question, also designed to invoke fear:

“Another question for the “gays” and their allies: on what basis do you declare sex acts between persons of the same sex moral (not immoral)? Please tell us so we can instruct our children and appropriately re-configure our Bibles”

It is not your bible that needs reconfiguring Peter, it is your tactics and motives to scare people about gays and lesbians.    This “ick” tactic is almost humorous.   As if the average American doesn’t realize that opposite sex couples also engage in “ick” acts, is it rarely the basis of their relationships.   Peter seems to think that all gays do in life is based on what we do in bed, but relationships based on sex don’t last and the studies prove that most gay relationships last about the same as their hetero counter-parts.  

A study by the Rhode Island Foundation (not a gay group) found:

“Rhode Island LGBTQ individuals have created lasting relationships and families. Fifty-three percent of all respondents reported being in monogamous relation-ships, with the average length of relationship being 7.25 years (range: one month to more than 39 years). Eighteen percent had previously been in a male-female marriage, and four percent were currently heterosexually married. Forty-five percent reported currently living with an LGBTQ partner (40% with partner, 5% with partner and children). According to the U.S. Census, 65% of the general Rhode Island population report living in a family household, with 48% living as married partners, and 31% living with children under 18.”

What is moral about gay sex isn’t the question Peter.   When you take your head out of the gutter, the question should have been what is moral about gay relationships which are not based on sex anymore than heterosexual relationships are.   So the answer you are looking for won’t come because you are not asking the right questions.

I will say that morality and god are separate.  They have to be since we have so many religions, gods, dogma’s, denominations yet somehow we all seem to agree on the bulk of morality.   Morality is more about human nature.   We know that it is wrong to starve children.  We know that it is wrong to spread rumors (or does Peter know that?), We all know that it is wrong to use violence or do we? While Peter is so obsessed with the morality of gay sex, he has ignored the fact we live in a world with far greater immorality than that.  

The answer Peter is really looking for he won’t ever get, but to answer the question of why gay relationships are moral Peter, it is because that is the way I was made and it wouldn’t be moral for me to live my life alone, depressed and dysfunctional.   Instead of being a burden to society I have made the best of the hand I was dealt.  I have sought happiness and love and found both.   Good for you that you think it is immoral.  Most gays and lesbians could care less what you think about the morality of our relationships, but your constant barrage of hate material, fear tactics and call to arms are far more immoral action than anything I am capable of.

In his post, Peter asks all sorts of questions of gays.  Before editing it out of the article he called it a “Challenge” to gays to prove the morality of gay sex (again, shouldn’t have been the question).   I challenge Peter, as I have before with no response:

You are against hate crime laws, violence prevention, recognition for gays, anti-bullying laws, diversity programs and anything else that shows us in a nice light.  Your mission is all about exposing us, demeaning us, dehumanizing us.  You wish to have sodomy laws reinstated, bar us from serving in the miliatary, taking our children away.   With all that said, where do we fit into your mission?  What does the world look like when you reach your goal? What is your goal?   What is the end game for us?  Where are the gay people?   Are we dead?    In jail?  In the camps waiting to be gassed?  I keep asking this question and you keep avoiding it.  Was is that?